Busyness

Sabrina's post made me think about what I've got left to do this summer and I what I've done...and I tell ya...my summer has flown. The driving to Reedsburg once a week seems to be helping it go by in a flash...I couldn't imagine if I had to go twice a week.

I haven't really done much so far this summer....cause we were busy with work and swimming lessons....we did however find time to take a day for just the two of us and go to a movie. We drove to the Dells to see Over the Hedge. It was really a cute movie...and then we drove the strip and stopped at a t-shirt place....she got a nightgown that has a picture of a dog with angel wings...and it says 100% Angel. It's cute...anyway...after that we went out for dinner. It was nice.

What we have left to do this summer, however is a lot of stuff....so here it is:

Go to theMadison Zoo
Go to the Madison Arboretum
Go to a play or musical (she expressed interest in this when mom told her about APT)
Go to Noah's Ark
Swimming Lessons
Dance Class
Piano Lessons
Learn to ride bike without training wheels
Ride the bike trail
Canoeing
Jen Visiting
Visting baby Baumstark
finishing Tim's christmas present finally (lol, I'm an ass)
Starting baby Wilbanks present
clean the front room of my house
Paint said room
move stuff to new garage and mud room (when they finally get around to putting it up)

And there is sooo much more...and I can't even think of it. But the above are things that are a must

Sick and Tired

What a lovely day this was. Or not. I'm starting to get sick...mostly a severyly sore throat and cough. And I'm soooooo tired of my living situation. This morning just a little tiny thing set me off...and I was on a roll...not letting anyone else talk to keep me from getting even more angry. I'm to the point where I want to find another place to live. I've kept most everything that really bothers me bottled up when it comes to Tammi and her kids....but I am at my breaking point. Not only do they not treat their mother with any respect or consideration, but they don't show me any either. It all really started to break down last night when Elena "asked me a question"....which was...."how come we have to pick up our stuff and you don't have to pick up after your self?" EXCUSE ME!!!!!! First of all I'm never really home to even have a mess and I was doing their dishes from that day....and if they didn't make the messes they wouldn't have to clean them up....and later I told Tammi about it....and she made an excuse for why she said it "Oh she probably said that, because this morning you left the ashtray on the table with garbage in it, and I had Elena throw it away." First of all..don't make an excuse...call her in there immediately and say something to her...in front of me, so I know it was done...and most of the so called pile of garbage in the ashtray were wrappers from them anyway...and everyday I pick up their wrappers and garbage and blankets and towels...so on and so forth...oh and everyday almost, I have to put away the milk...how hard is it to put away milk. Then Darrin got home last night and immediately started giving his mom attitude...cause one of his asshole friends came up and told him that his mom said he had to be home in 5 minutes or he was grounded and he came home pissed off....this shit the friend told him....not true other than the your mom said to go home. And I even told him this...but he insisted on the fact that his friend wasn't lying at all....so what do I get to listen to for about 1/2 to 45 min...fighting and crying...and an almost 14 year old boy acting like a 10 year old girl. And Tammi yelling at him and threatening to kick his ass...whatever...he can be such a prick...but she totally can't deal with it in a proper way....not ever...I've learned how to deal with him and get through to him....and I've only really known him 2 years...then...this morning....I ask Tori and Mickayla to let the dogs out...with Fluffy this means, one holds his collar while the other hooks him up to the chain (while the fence is out of commission)well, Tori hit Mickayla with the door, she lost her grip or something and Fluffy got away. The next thing I hear is Tori....."mickayla you let him go, why did you do that"......."it was an accident, you hurt my wrist"...then some other talking...and the Tori yells "you did that on purpose!!!".....great...the dog got out...but oh well...what can I do...I'm not even dressed yet....I call Mickayla so she can get dressed....and about 5 min later in comes Tori...."Mickayla let Fluffy get away"....and I was like "well I heard her say hit her in the hand with the door.." "NO!"....."Yeah, it was my wrist." said Mickayla......"No I didn't....your blaming me!" (imagine this from Tori in a half yell, half whining voice. I thump her on the head...stop it now! I say....Mickayla did even say anything to me...and from what I heard you were blaming her...cause I heard you tell her that she did it on purpose, so don't come in here and continue to blame her...cause it was you too....

about 10 minutes later I'm in the living room getting ready to fix Mickayla's hair and I hear Tori "Cassie flicked me on my forehead and I didn't do anything"....and Elena (who wasn't even there) then says yeah she did...really hard. I stormed up the stairs...and I was pissed...and I started yelling and was like Oh Tori you know why I did it...and I didn't hardly even touch you....and you came in my room blaming Mickayla for letting Fluffy...and tried to tell me she blamed you when that never happened...and Tammi said something and I was like "I'm sick of your fucking asshole kids" or something like that...."I'm sick of how they treat me, how they treat you and how they treat Mickayla. Every time I get after them they come running to you and you let them get away with it..." And Tammi was like "oh when I get after Mickayla she comes to you and tells you what I did...." (which maybe once she's done this Tammi's kids do it no matter WHAT I say) "and I was like so, what did you do to deserve it"...and she said that that is what she does...but if this is how her kids treat me...I doubt it...and I was pissed...I wouldn't let her even say 3 words....cause I didn't want to hear the excuses...and maybe I went overboard...but I'm tired of it....cause it's not fair to me....and I did say something to her about how she "handles" problems...because she's like when my kids treat you that way...you might not see it...but I take care of it....like with Elena last night...and she looked at Elena and was like "I got after you last night didn't I" and Elena said yeah....and the Tammi said "and what did I say if you ever do it again?" and Elena replied...."I don't know" wow...she really handled that good...cause if she did...Elena would remember damn well what would happen to her if she disrespected me again...there is more to it...but I tired of it....and I just realized how much I have ranted and told about it...

The point of this long boring story. Tammi needs learn a different method of getting her kids to be mature and respectable or I'm gonna kill them all. Cause I can tell you damn well that Mickayla would never even consider talking to me the way Elena and Darrin and even Tori do...She'd be grounded from everything for a really long time....but...she wouldn't consider it even because I raised her right...and whether or not Tammi did the best she could in the situation she was in...it's time for her excuses for her assholes...I mean kids to stop. And for them to grow up and get over the fact that they have to listen to me...and that they have to listen to her...and if they don't....Mickayla is going to learn from them...as she already has (because they have taught her naughty words, rhymes, and other things...)

I am terrible blogger

Ok...I know it's been awhile...but not much has been going on with me...other than the baby shower, and Sabrina covered that (besides I have no pictures). So, today, with a little nudge from Beeth and something that irritates me...I am going to blog.

It's just one of those things that makes you wanna poke someone in the eye...

Ok...so the girl in my last post does something on a daily basis that really annoys me. It doesn't matter where I go for lunch, she HAS to know what I ate. Ok, so it's one thing if I bring back food and she asks "oh what is that? It looks yummy." That is ok...I do that sometimes...but this is EVERY TIME...and even when I don't bring food back. I say I'm going to lunch, she says...where are you going? Even though it's always home or to Dan and Nancy's...nothing big...or she'll wait till I come back..."What did you eat for lunch?" The part about that that is the worst is the fact that I almost always have the same thing for lunch every day...no matter where I go to eat it. But today really irritated me. I had to go to Madison for a Dr. appointment this morning...so I stopped by Qudoba and brought myself back lunch. It was early so I didn't eat there (it was not even 11). So I get back and let her know I'm here, but I'll be up in the office eating my lunch if she needs me. She says..."oh what did you get" ....mmm...."taco salad"........"from where"....."a place in Madison"........"what place"........"Qudoba".........5 minutes later she comes up in my office....."what's in it".......*sigh*"lettuce, beans, corn, chicken with a mexican sauce, fresh mild salsa, sour cream, cheese, guacamole, and the taco shell of course" (note that she had to know EVERYTHING that was in it)....."oh........how much did it cost?" WHAT!!!!! I'm thinking what the fuck...who cares...it's what I wanted to eat so I got it...I eat Qudoba like once every 9 months...and it's not her business......"I don't know....I didn't pay attention"......"oh"..... I wanted to poke her eye out.....stuff like that drives me crazy...let me sit here and eat my damn lunch...it's not your lunch...I'm not going to share my lunch...so you might as well back off honey. So there you go...there is an update into my fun and exciting life...annoying girl at work annoys me once again.

I'm not a very good boss

I've decided that I'm not really that great at my job...because when it comes to being the mean boss...I'm not very good at it. I have a hard time being stern and strict and telling them (my employees) "hey, this is how it is gonna work." However, this morning I was good...because I was mad, one of the girls was supposed to be here at 9, she left before me (I know this because she passed me) and I was running late...and I still beat her here by almost 10 minutes....as in she got here at 5-10 after 9...so I was here 10-15 minutes before her and I had to drop Mickayla off at Daycare....so I, without being too harsh, was like look, when the schedule says to be here at 9, that means 10 to or quarter to...and I know we've talked about this before...but your job when you get here at 9 is to open up, so there is no reason I should be the one getting everything ready...yeah, maybe if I have all my morning work done or sometimes just to be nice, I'll help open up...but that is really your job..that's why you get here so early....and I made a couple other points clear too....so hopefully she'll start doing what I say instead of acting like she only has to half listen to me. Which is part of why I have a problem confronting her in the first place...I don't think she really thinks that she needs to listen to me.

Dreams

My Dream:

Sabrina and I were at work at Dan and Nancy's and Mark's family was there, well, it was Sharon Charlie, Mike, Erin, Jennifer, and Bob Bothe (only he was a black or black/middle eastern, with his voice, attitude, all over personality) and Bob wanted some new fangled type of beer that we didn't have...so he came back to look with no luck...then Mark came in got some food to go and left (even though Sabrina was working and his family was there). Then Jackie Alikas brought in a pizza (I think it may have been Kwik Trip cause of the size) and had a slice and went in the back...well some guys came in and one asked if he could just eat the rest of the pizza and I was like sure and the other left a breakfast casserole there with one piece missing. Then all of a sudden I was outside at the Labor Day Fair only it was held at the park area by the airport here in town. Well, all of a sudden I was landing a plane (by the way there were like 30 planes at the airport too) and I got out and there were these two people who decided that they wanted to fly the plane and I was like "are you sure they can fly that plane they've never flown before" to some guy who I'm assuming was in charge or something...and he was like "oh they'll be fine"....then the people took off, the plane flipped one and a half times so it ended upside down and then crashed to the ground...I laughed and then was walking back into the bar and told everyone about it and started putting away foot long hotdogs...then Tammi woke me up.

It was a weird dream...cause first of all, why would anyone let someone fly a plane if they've never done it before...and why would I laugh when it crashed.

Anyway, here's what the dream thing had to say about it.

Airplane Crash
To dream that a plane crashes, suggests that you have set overly high and unrealistic goals for yourself. Your goals may be too high and are impossible to realize. You are in danger of having it come crashing down. Alternatively, your lack of confidence, self-defeating attitude and self-doubt toward the goals you have set for yourself is represented by the crashing airplane; you do not believe in your ability to attain those goals. Loss of power and uncertainty in achieving your goals are also signified.

So does this mean that my weight loss and stop smoking goals I've set I should just give up on cause they are unattainable...and is that why I laughed at the plane crash in my dream...cause subconsiously I know that they are ridiculous ideas. hmmmmm...I shall ponder this.

Exercise

Sunday night I told Mickayla that she would be starting T Ball on Monday...and she was very very excited. On Mon, she woke up at about 7:45am and sat right up and asked if it was time for T Ball. I told her no, and let her know that she needed to get ready and come to work with me and after work, she would have T Ball. She was her usual self "OK!" So we put on the clothes we were gonna wear to practice and left for work. She helped me get everything set up and ate breakfast and then said "I'm going to go do my exercises for T Ball" I said ok and off she went. She did her "jumps" whatever that means, running in place, and push ups. When some else got her and I could go run my errands (bank, post office, dad's office, mom's) she decided that she wanted to stay with Grandma...I said ok and the next thing I knew she was asking if she could go exercise on the treadmill (to get in shape for t ball is what she said) Grandma let her. Then I called later on and mom was giggling on the phone and I asked her what was up and she said Mickayla was exercising on the Total Gym now. Too Funny. And every 20 min or so she'd ask if it was time to go to T Ball.

Busy Busy

So, I've begun to realize that I'm going to be pretty busy this summer. And I'm already starting to notice all that "the older your kids get" stuff that people talk about. For example..."the older they get the more they'll want to be involved in" or "the older they get the less time there is for what you want to do" which the latter in my case is fine, since I don't really have anything that I really want to do anyway. So, yeah Mickayla is just going to be in Kindergarten and I'm already changing my schedule around to be able to run her to the things she wants to be involved in. On Mon and Wed, I leave work at 4:30 (after an argument with my mom about how I'm going to make up the time even though it is still an 8 hour day and there are a lot of weeks that I work over 50 hours), I believe it is Tuesdays at 10am, I will be running her to Reedsburg for a Jazz class....which I figure since she'll be taking ballet again in the fall it wouldn't hurt to let her try Jazz for a couple weeks during the summer but that breaks up my day from 10-12 give or take a couple of minutes her and there....then there are swimming lessons...now, I haven't signed her up yet (I'll do that this afternoon)....but those are everyday for like two weeks...now, I think Cindy takes the kids in to the pool for swimming lessons, but I'm not sure...so we'll find out. While these three things may not sound too bad (cause they are not, and they will keep my little munchkin busy) I feel I may be running myself a bit ragged... Oh and now, since mom and I were talking about it.....Mickayla has been on my butt to quit smoking and for her and I to exercise.....and I tell you what...having her around for that has helped. So we will see. Sorry for such a boring post...but I just thought I'd give you a little insight to my craziness.